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KETO Sweets feauturing KetoBrownie!

  It’s been 9 months since the beginning of my ketogenic journey. I’ve been so fortunate to find the best support in the world. The Ketog...

Monday, October 9, 2017

 It’s been 9 months since the beginning of my ketogenic journey. I’ve been so fortunate to find the best support in the world. The Ketogenic community is one like any other. I’ve been able to share stories, connect with others, and relate to the struggles that come with kicking sugar.
  Sweets were/are the hardest thing for me to kick. I love sweets, but what reformed carb addict doesn’t? Sure there are “cheater” keto sweets, but often the calories are totally empty. Wasting calories sucks, well it does when you’re counting them. Protein bars from Kirkland are great, but really weren’t hitting my sweet craving. Plus the texture kind of freaked me out. It was like chewing gum.  
 I had given up when something glorious happened… I saw a post on Instagram about a new product called “Keto Brownie.” Now at first I was just as skeptical as all of you. I don’t like being disappointed. The second I tried the Keto Brownie angels sung. The product has no sugar alcohols, which means no bad stomach reactions. It’s not like a traditional brownie but I loved every morsel of it! The decadent hint of almond changed  me, and added a depth of flavor. The texture was chewy, but not offensive. The flavor is absolutely perfect, not too sweet but gets the sweet tooth satisfied. The Keto Brownie almost reminds me of the cookie that's on the outside of ice cream sandwiches.
 With my new found love I decided to make a few dessert type dishes with the Keto Brownie. Two of my favorite desserts are Trifles, and ice cream sandwiches. Keto Brownie is the PERFECT brownie for this.

 If you don’t know what a triffle is, it’s a layered dessert with a cake/brownie/cookie stacked with a whipped topping. Almost like a dessert lasagna, but served in a pretty glass bowl. They’re perfect to make individual dessert cups for a party! I usually make them for when we have BBQ’s and other events. The simplicity and deliciousness speaks for it self.
 The first step to making a killer trifle is the whipped cream. I’m 100% a whipped cream snob. You can use store bought, but there really is nothing like fresh, homemade goodness. 
  Start with 1 1/2 cups of heavy whipping cream. The fresher the better. Pour the heavy cream into a bowl. I use 5 packets of stevia, because I’m lazy and buy the packets. Begin whipping the cream with the mixer. Add the stevia one packet, or one teaspoon at a time. Then pour in a teaspoon of almond extract. 
Whip at a medium/high speed. Watch the texture of the cream.
I like to add a teaspoon of almond extract, instead of the traditional vanilla. The almond flavor in the whipped cream compliments the brownie well. When soft peaks have formed in the whipped cream stop mixing. Cover the bowl and set it in the fridge. 
 Grab two small glass jars, or clear glass bowls. One Keto Brownie will make two mini trifles. Unwrap the brownie, and grab a knife. You’re going to cut it in half like you would cut a bagel. Now you have two thin, full length bars.

    I like to cut each half into 8 pieces. Set 3 pieces at the bottom of each cup. Grab your whipped cream and dollop a good amount on top of the brownie. Then place 3 more pieces on top of the whipped cream, and repeat the whipped cream. The last two pieces I like to crumble, and place on top! If you’re feeling extra fancy add a few strawberry slices on top for the perfect low carb dessert!

I love ice cream sandwiches. LOVE them. It’s been hard to give them up but I’m so happy I found an alternative. 
 You’re going to start with cutting the Keto Brownie in half like a bagel again. Grab a sheet of parchment paper and roll out the two halves so they’re thinner! This will make it the PERFECT ice cream sandwich texture. 

 I use Halo Top as my ice cream of choice, but you can use any low carb ice cream. For this test batch I used Halo Top’s Oatmeal cookie. I can’t get enough of it lately! I took 1 1/2 servings of Halo Top and let it soften. This took about 25 minutes of being on my counter. On the parchment paper, liberally spread the soft ice cream on top of the Brownie halves. Stack the halves like a traditional ice cream sandwich. Wrap in parchment paper, and chill for 30 minutes before serving. 

Overall, the KetoBrownie is the most versital, tasty product that I've tried in a while! I can't wait for them to expand! You can order yours HERE! Go support this growing business!


Saturday, August 26, 2017

 When we start getting more comfortable with parenthood, we get a little cocky. "We've got this, we can handle anything!" We've all been there...
  WRONG. Just when I think I have a firm grasp on the balls that are parenthood, I am slapped off my pearly white pedestal with a crisp slap of reality. Here is that reality today.
   I have no clue how to parent my toddler.
 There it is in large, bold text. I even centered it, so you know this is serious. 12 point font really just wasn't getting the point across. I've spent the better part of the last 6 months trying to find my role. I've read the parenting books (that I typically don't like) from all ends of the spectrum. I've read the crunchy mom guidelines about being a parent that blows positivity and glitter out of their dirt star, to the books the say everything I'm feeling. For example, "Like serial killers toddlers lack empathy." (Toddlers are Assholes and it's not your fault by the HILARIOUSLY brilliant Bumni Laditian. Read it.) These books are all so great. Really, they are! They help so many people. Yet here I sit, on my bed surrounded by laundry, and broken dreams still not knowing what the fuck I'm doing. If my life were an emoji it would be this one...
                                                     Image result for what emoji
 Every. single. day is something different. Just when I think my book is full of tricks I realize that I truly know nothing and my toddler is outsmarting me. He knows he's smarter than I am too. Just the other day I told him to do something. He shot back the cheesiest, evilest little grin while replying with a firm "No thanks." At least he's polite? I often find myself staring into his beautiful blue eyeballs, wondering how such a tiny human can be so amazing, and terrifying all at once. I know I'm not alone in feeling this way, because I see the same "type" of Mom standing next to me in the "parenting help" section looking confused, tired, and mentally over it. The books fly off the shelves, and Mom blogs are more popular then ever. The other day I sat with two books on my nightstand that totally contradicted one another leaving me more lost then when I started. I took to the online forums which was a huge mistake because sanctimommies flock like seagulls to a french fry when you ask about discipline. *Squaaaack know better, do better squaaaaaack* Did I mention I hate SanctiMommies?  I tried taking a little bit of advice from everything I read. So far somethings are working, some aren't. I'm still on the verge of insanity but I'm learning. It's okay to have no clue what you are doing.
  What it boils down to is this simple message. No one has any idea what the fuck they are doing. They can pretend all they want. The harsh reality is kids are insane, but we love them. We are never going to know exactly what to do for every single kid, because like pimples all kids are different. Go with the flow, learn as you go, and make sure there is one place in your house where you can lock yourself in for 38 seconds of sanity. 
 I think of it this way, this kid has lived longer than all of my house plants. Can I get an Amen?


Here are links to all the parenting books I've read incase you want to let them sit on your coffee table for a few months, before sending them to goodwill.







Sunday, August 20, 2017

             Image result for self care gif

 Before my mental illness reached the climax of it’s existence, I always thought self care was about physical care, not mental. I thought of things like, going to the salon, or taking a hot silent bath.  Back then I was right. It was amazing what a fresh coat of nail polish, and 10 minutes of adele could do. Things got different, as they do after having a baby.  A trip to the nail salon left me anxious, uptight, and nauseous. I had no time to take a bath, and I really didn’t want to sit in silence. Silence was scary. 
  I knew I had to take care of myself, or I couldn’t take care of my son. But how? How does one practice self care when your whole world revolves around a baby? I did the typical Pinterest search
        Self Care for Moms.
  Take a soothing bath, listen to music, go get a pedicure, go get a massage, talk with a friend, go to an animal shelter. 
   All of those suggestions made my stomach curl. I didn’t want to be anywhere near other people, or in public. The very idea of stepping out of my comfort zone, or putting on pants actually caused the deepest, soul clenching panic one could imagine. So I sat with my infant, and let my depression, and anxiety build into something massive. 
  As my life progressed, I decided, well my husband actually decided that I need SOMETHING. So I opened my laptop one day and just started writing. I poured out every emotion that I could in the way I knew best. I spared no shameful frustration, or dirty detail- and I mean dirty. I talked about diapers, vomit, tears, and everything in between. After writing a few “essays” if you will I shared one with the ladies I had gotten close with on my BirthBoard. They all laughed, while encouraging me to share more. I love the feeling of making people laugh. It’s almost soul cleansing, knowing that your words or actions can change someones mood. I felt like my essays were relatable, which is why they got a laugh. There was no “perfect parent” talk, or showing off. It was all real moments in our every day life. So every night I carved out at least 30 minutes where I could spill everything I was feeling. The more I wrote, the better I felt. My light was finally lit again, after so long. I enjoyed my quiet time, and sometimes I even wrote when my life wasn’t quiet. 
 After a few more weeks, I decided to further my sharing by starting a blog. I told myself;
            Even if no one reads it, at least this will make you feel okay.
  With the blog started, I just let it flow. Every emotion poured out of me, in the snarky, humorous way that I spoke. The more and more readers I got, the crazier it all got. The feedback was warming my damaged soul. Even when the negative feed back came in, it still meant someone was taking the time out of their day to read what I wrote. 
  Now, two years later writing is my safe space. I was lucky enough to be given a writing prompt journal from my best friend. It’s filled with 300 questions, and space to answer them. They make me dig deep into my emotions, and sometimes they make me laugh. I also journal, for when writing a post, or filling in a prompt just aren’t doing it for me. 

   Self care isn’t the same for everyone. You have to soul search to find out what works best for you. It may take a few tries, but never get discouraged. Practicing self care has made me a better wife, a more patient mom, and truer version of myself. 

Saturday, August 12, 2017

   Like most people with a blog, children, pets, and souls my life is hot mess. I'm always late, forgetting things, or dropping shit. Don't deny it, embrace it. I haven't washed my hair in 3 freakin' days. (I want to clarify that yes, I have showered, but washing my hair takes time and effort that this week really hasn't allowed.) I'm pretty sure my hair is 30% dry shampoo, 30% corn starch because I'm out of dry shampoo, and the rest of it is classified, unknown substances.
  With all that being said I am constantly looking for new things to make my life even the tiniest bit easier. Well... I have something that is going to change your life, and also rock your effin' world.
                                           AMAZON FRESH
I was super reluctant to give it a go because I am a total grocery snob. I'm very particular about my produce. I love to hand pick everything, but with a toddler who is going through a really rough stage, that isn't happening. Going to the grocery store turned into a nightmare for us. It was to the point where I was willing to go in the middle of the night so I could avoid bringing Tater. Two weeks ago my breaking point hit. I was done, so I logged into Amazon and gave fresh a go.
  Ordering was super fun, honestly. They have such a killer variety of food. Things from major stores, and local items. I got my ground beef from the butcher shop that we've used before. Because I am the biggest cheap ass on planet earth I compared prices on Amazon, and Kroger (using the Kroger app.) I was actually getting a good deal on most of the items I was buying. There were a few items that were more expensive, but I was willing to fork over the extra 50 cents for my sour cream to come to my door. They have "clippable" coupons, and daily deals for things people actually use too! All of my dreams were coming true as I added items to my virtual cart.
 At last, my cart was full. I triple checked everything, EVERYTHING. I even considered emptying my cart, and starting over.  I had a feeling of nervous/excited because this really was a huge step for me. I had zero control over my produce and that was nerve wrecking, honestly. I know that sounds like the stupidest thing ever but groceries are one of the few things in life that I can control! I selected the 6-8pm window, and at 6:18pm my groceries were delivered to my door step. They were in paper bags that had reusable silver bags to help keep things cool. There were gel ice packs, that I also am reusing. My groceries were carefully packed, nothing was squished or over lapping. It was seriously impressive!
  I put my groceries away in a tantrum free zone. There was absolutely no noise from the toddlernado. I got to the produce bag and took a deep breath. As I unpacked each item I examined it with a fine tooth comb. Everything looked amazing... I had nothing that I wanted to knit pick- which was huge. This simple service changed my whole world.  I know Walmart has delivery, and Kroger has "clicklist" but honestly I would rather give my money to Amazon, and the local places they get the food from! Plus I think I'd rather set money on fire before giving it to Satan's Playground (walmart).
 My second experience with Amazon Fresh was just as incredible!  I ordered Saturday night, and my stuff was delivered at 6 am. I woke up to fresh groceries on my door. How incredible is that?! I didn't have to put pants on to grocery shop. I didn't have to take my beautiful, heathen child to the store and listen to him whine for over an hour. I didn't have to fill in my eyebrows, or smell decent. (Please always wear deodorant. That's a given. You can even order your deodorant on Amazon Fresh! See what I did there?)
 Amazon Fresh is free for the first month and then $14.99 a month after that. After using, and comparing prices this is well worth the charge in just time alone. Delivery is free with purchases over 40 dollars, and they send you coupons and discount codes regularly. If you are in an area where Fresh isn't available email Amazon! Let them know you want Fresh in your region!
  Your time is valuable and so are you. Let someone else do your shopping, it's well worth the break. To the wonderfully people that work for Amazon Fresh, THANK YOU! Not all heroes wear capes.


Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Image result for oh fudge gif
 I would be lying if I said I was overjoyed to start potty training. The idea of not buying diapers is like a dream come true, but actually potty training sounds like everything I don't want to do. For some reason I got a wild hair up my ass and wanted to take care of it. I kept telling myself "Oh! it won't be that bad."
Well folks, I'm here to tell you it's THAT FUCKING BAD. Picture this: It's a hot day, and we are playing inside because lord knows I'm not about to stand on my unshaded patio while the sun blisters my delicate Scandinavian skin. At this point in this adventure we've introduced Tater to the potty and he says "Poop!!!"when he has to go. From across the room I hear this silly little "Poop!"
  I rush to get the little kid potty out of the bathroom (like some sort of unpaid bar bathroom attendant- except I don't have mints and dollar store perfumes). I move like a leopard to try and get the Tater to poop on the potty.
 I make it out of the bathroom with the potty to find a small two year old shitting under my kitchen table on my carpeted floor. We both just kind of stared at each other, I had a look of disgust, while his was a grin of ragging satisfaction. I don't think he could have grinned any bigger, honestly. Shit eating grin no pun intended.  For a second I just stood there, really unsure how I needed to handle this. I wanted to scream my head off, yet I didn't want to scare him from using the potty. All I could say was "We poop in the potty." Nothing more, nothing less. I cleaned him up, diapered him, and cleaned the floor. Of course it had to be the smelliest toddler poop in the history of the universe (fucking blueberries.) It was like the episode of 'The Office' where Packer takes a dump on Michael's carpet. Oddly I thought I would always be Packer in that situation. (If you don't know what I'm talking about stop reading my blog, go to Netflix and watch the US version of The Office. DO IT.)
   My house smelled like a rotting Chuck E Cheese.  The carpet cleaner and it's magical liquid lavender kind of broke through the smell but I still feel like we had to evacuate the building for safety/sanity reasons.
  Me being the well put together, structured parent that I am, I put my shoeless child in the car. With no idea where we were going but it just wasn't here. Target would cause a melt down, the park was too hot (seriously it was like Satan's dirt star hot.) I didn't want to dare to take him into a restaurant or movie theater because, no. (No explanation needed there.) It was almost 5 o'clock... almost dinner time. Micky D's wasn't an option, so I decided on the next best thing...
  We pulled into the ice cream parlor parking lot. All of Tater's dreams came true in that moment. I know what you're thinking.. "You shouldn't reward him for shitting on your carpet!" Yet, here I was "rewarding" him. Really what happened was my ability to give a single care failed me. I was done with the day. Emotionally, physically, mentally DONE. Bedtime was still hours away so I had to figure something out.
 We walked in to what was total chaos. Moms and kids everywhere, we fit right in. Every kid was a sticky, dirty, happy mess, all while the mom's looked at ease. My choice was valid. Tater picked the cotton candy ice cream which was blue, purple, and green. He had a white shirt on, and I didn't care. We sat in the grass under the mist machine and he became a happy, sticky, dirty mess. We sat while he ate, and talked about the trees and the sky. We laughed, and the frustrating day started to melt away. The smell of 'poopmageden' slowly disappeared from my nose.
 We walked around in the heat of 10,000 suns for a few minutes before heading to the car. We buckled up, and I put on the Moana soundtrack for the one millionth time this week. We sang along until part way through song 3 (the one they sing in the village, it's like the island is all you need, I'm too lazy to google it.) I heard soft little snores coming from the seat behind me. I turned off the music and for a moment our whole world was calm. I took a deep breath before the internal struggle of waking him up hit me. It was only 6:15 which meant if he slept through the night he'd be up at 4:30 a.m.
 I carried his sleepy, heavy ass body into the house. Why did I choose a house with stairs? Seriously carrying a 42 pound toddler up the stairs is the worst. I tucked his sleepy little face in, and closed the door. I'll take the 4 am wake up.

He woke up at 8:30 because he peed through his diaper. THERE IS NO WINNING.


You can follow my fitness/mom/poop journey on Instagram! @raisingtaters

Friday, July 14, 2017

Oh the Mom shaming. I've talked about that a lot. So many other "Mommy bloggers" have too, because we are all sick of the same shit. Today's post is coming from a real moment that happens everyday in my life.
   My two year old is fucking wild, and I'm sick of apologizing for it. I'm done. I have a two year old little boy who could literally run circles around me 24 hours a day, if I'd let him.(Let's be honest, there are some days that he does.)  He tests every fiber of my being both mentally and physically. Sometimes he even makes me question every choice I've ever made. He is rowdy, loud, and full of life. He loves to play, hear him self make noise (that's a nice way of saying he likes to scream like a monkey,) and he truly is a little boy full of love. He's curious about everything. There is not a single thing in this world that he doesn't want to touch, lick or hug. Sometimes in that order. He is that kid in the grocery store making noise, saying hi to people, and sometimes screaming because I won't let him lick the grocery cart. He has meltdowns in public, and it's not because I don't parent him, or that he's spoiled... IT'S BECAUSE HE IS FUCKING TWO.
  I've spent a lot of my life around little people, and two year olds are the most irrational little monsters out there. I know they say 3 is worse, but it's a different kind of "worse." Two is a whole different ballpark of tears, and melted fruit snacks. Image result for toddler comic
  The more I write this post the more the fire in me is fueled. I spend so much of my time with him in public apologizing to strangers who are judging me. I was at the park when a little girl punched Tater in the face because he hugged her. I apologized to the mom because my 2 year old isn't quite getting the personal space issue yet, again because he is 2. She was mad at me, even though her kid clocked mine in the face. THERE IS NO WINNING.
                                      Image result for toddler comic
  In the grocery store, I spend my trip apologizing to others for him being loud. At the gym I apologize because sometimes in the kids center he's an asshole, or wears shoes in the maze. No matter where we are, I apologize to humans that don't even matter, all because I have a wild, free spirited, slightly nuts but still sweet two year old.
                               Image result for toddler comic
  No there is nothing wrong with him, yes I've spent more time on Google seeing if he was a sociopath, more time than I'd like to admit. I've talked to his doctor, I've read every freaking "positive parenting" bullshit magic guide there is out there. There is only one solution to this problem, and that is to let my kid be a little wild. I'm not saying I'm going to let him be an unruly little turd, but if he wants to hear his voice echo in Costco, cool.
  I'm so tired of everything being a battle, yes there are rules he has to learn. I try and teach him those rules, but I'm not going to try and force him to be this quiet, little angel that he just isn't right now. Even on the days that he makes me cry or when he makes me want to leave him at the fire station- I still love the wonder in his eyes.
  So to all of those who judge the Mom with the wild child, bite me. I'm done apologizing to you all. I'm done caring about your useless opinion, and I could care less about the fact that you think I'm a bad Mom.
  To all the parents out there with wild two year olds... I feel you. I feel your struggle, your hurt, and your embarrassment. It's freaking hard! Raising a 2 year old is emotionally taxing enough, so don't let worry of others crowd your mind. You are a great parent, with a good kid who's an asshole sometimes. Guess what, you aren't alone.

Friday, June 23, 2017

All aboard hydration station y'all, It's time to chug chug that water!
  Water is so freaking important for our bodies, but it's sometimes so hard to drink. I mean maybe if water tasted like a gin and tonic, we would all drink more. BUUUUT it doesn't. I used to HATE water. In all reality I just hated drinking anything that wasn't coffee or soda. I was so dehydrated all the time, it's a miracle I didn't turn into beef jerky, or human jerky (because all though I spiritually identify with cows, I am not one.)
  After Tater was born I dried out so bad, so slowly but surely I started to consume more water.  After time passed I hated it less and less. Now water is my go to drink, even over coffee and gin. "Experts" say you should take your body weight, divide it by two and that's how much water you should drink in a day. I shoot for a gallon everyday. I try to drink water every time my hands are free, and I also have alarms set on my phone to remind me to drink water.
 When eating keto water is REALLY effing important, vital to the success of losing fat.  It's also important to balance your electrolytes. If you are eating keto you can't drink Gatorade, which I don't really recommend anyone drink that glorified sugar water- but on keto absolutely not! Even after becoming a water person I still struggle with wanting water, and consuming it like I should. It's boring, and we live in a world where everything has flavors. I have some awesome hydration solutions to make water suck less.
 1. Mio water "enhancers" These fun little squeeze bottles make everything a little happier!                                                       Image result for mio
They have a ton of flavors, including flavors that are similar to Gatorade that come with electrolytes! I buy mine at Target (shocking, I know.)

2. LEMON & Pink Salt!
I love lemon in my water, but when you add just a touch of pink salt to it, it's like Gatorade without the garbage! You can find out why salt is so important on the keto diet HERE.

3. Cute water bottle.
  This is literally the stupidest thing ever, but I totally drink more water when it comes from a cute water bottle. If I just have a glass, I won't drink it. My brain is kind of a mess though, so this might not work for you.

4. Set alarms on your phone
  My Mama Q and I do this, because we suck at hydration. She just started her keto journey, and when I told her I set alarms she laughed a bit before realizing how much of a freaking genius I am. I have alarms at 9am, 1pm, 6pm, and 9pm. I chug my water bottle no matter where I am.

5. Drink half your body weight in water.
  I'm so competitive, so it's like a game for myself. I realize not everyone is a competitive dick head, but this strategy works for me.

  These aren't perfect, or down to a science but those 5 little tidbits truly help me stay hydrated in a day! So set some timers, add some flavor and chug your water!

Thursday, June 15, 2017

  Oh man is losing weight after babies hard. When I first got pregnant with Tater I was heavy then I would have liked to be. I didn't workout, and we ate a lot of comfort foods. When I found out I was pregnant I took eating for two quite literally. I ate whatever, whenever. I slowly, but surely turned into a blob I didn't recognize. After Tater I was determined to get that weight off. I did okay for a while... Tried every snake oil out there, but guess what... None of it worked with lasting results. Which I'm totally to blame for. We ate like garbage. Pasta, potatoes, cake.... All of it. I lost myself.
  I tried to sell a product for a while, but after a few months it stopped working, and I ballooned out. I weighed more than I did when I gave birth.... It was horrifying. I hated myself.
  In December of 2016 I had enough... I was so sick of feeling like garbage and looking like it too. I was so unhappy in my own skin. B found this "diet" that I thought was going to fail because the whole premise of it was based on FAT. Eating fat... ALL the fat. I thought he was crazy, but since I would follow this man into the fiery pits of hell, or California I jumped on board.
 Fast forward 5 months. I am down 60 pounds. Sixty. SIX ZERO. All by eating things like bacon, butter, and heavy cream. Everything we know about weight loss is wrong with keto. HERE is the post where I talk about science and all that jazz.
  Every single day I get messages on Instagram about what the hell I'm doing, and why it's working. I love sharing my journey with everyone because I thought I could never lose weight again. One of the main things I'm asked is what are my favorite keto essentials. I have a ton of them that I love, but I want to share my absolute #cnlwtkt (Yep, here I am making hashtags again. This one is Cannot live without these Keto things. Really smooth, right? Word master over here, look out world.)
  These are not things you HAVE to have to do a ketogenic diet, please keep that in mind.

  1. MCT Oil
         MCT oil is a concentrated form of coconut oil. We all know that coconut oil fixes all your problems, so this is like the super glue of oil. This shit is like rocket fuel. When I mix it in my coffee I get a huge boost of energy. Be warned though, if you take too much you will literally shit your pants when you sneeze. No amount of sphincter tightening exercises will save you, friends. I use 1/4 teaspoon in my bulletproof coffee. It will totally keep you regular. ** On a side note, I totally don't recommend using this coconut oil as lube.***
                               Image result for mct oil
  You can buy the brand I use HERE

2. Heavy Whipping Cream
  Lord Jesus, do I love this stuff. You can add it to anything. Literally ANYTHING. It's amazing in coffee, or in dishes. I love making cream sauces to top everything I eat. Literally I would eat anything covered in a cream sauce. Plus if you want a sweet treat, you just whip this up with some powdered peanut butter and call it a day. I always buy the Market Pantry Brand from Target (because I live at Target, and it's always on Cartwheel so you save money!) Honestly if I could bathe in heavy cream I totes would.

3. Kerrygold Butter
  I FUCKING LOVE BUTTER. I feel like I connect to Paula Dean on a spiritual level because of how much I love butter. You can do literally everything with butter. Butter is what holds my dreams up high. Kerrygold butter is a special breed of creamy gold. It's the perfect butter, and believe me when I say I've tried them all. It's creamy, slightly salty, and it's what keto dreams are made of. It's grassfed, and imported from Ireland. This is the end all, be all of butter. Like if it was a person, it would be 2016 Martha Stewart ( I also love post jail Martha.)
Image result for Kerrygold butter
I buy mine at Costco, in a 3 pack!

4. Vegetable Spritzer
  Do you know how many cool things you can do with these bad boys? You can spiralize ANYTHING. Including pepperoni. You can literally make pepperoni noodles. NOODLES MADE OF MEAT. Also zucchini noodles are pretty amazing too. I have the AS SEEN ON TV one, because I am a total sucker for that section in Target. I do have the 10 dollar one because I am so freaking cheap.
Image result for Vegetti
You can buy this HERE

  5. BPI Sports Preworkout
  Preworkout is a struggle for me, because usually the sugar free pre workout tastes like a soggy butthole. Okay, maybe not that dramatic, but it at least tastes like dumpster juice. BPI is 100% Keto friendly, and they have the best flavors. Watermelon and Snowcone are my favorites. Plus they give me insane amounts of energy. Like, INSANE. You can look at the whole line HERE

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 Like I said, these things are totally not needed to do a ketogenic diet, but I find them super helpful. Over the next few weeks I'm going to be doing a series on Keto, and how it's changed my life. I can't wait to share my victories and fails with you all. 

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

  If you follow me on Instagram you've seen my whole weight loss journey play out, including all of the really delicious food I'm eating. We went Keto- low carb, high fat. If you missed those blog posts you can find them HERE.
 One of my favorite recipes that has become a staple in this house is "Eggroll in a bowl" or my favorite name for it... CRACK SLAW!!! It's so tasty, addicting and really effing delicious. Everyone always asks me for the recipe so I figured I'd fork it over for you!
  There are hundreds of crack slaw recipes but this one has been tweaked by me, and approved by the Sasquatch. It takes me about 25 minutes to make, and it's so freaking good.

  What you need:

  •    1 12-14 oz package of coleslaw mix. You can use angel hair coleslaw or the traditional 3 color slaw. If you're fancy, and not lazy you can shred some cabbage. That's just now how we do things here. Show me up, I don't care. I know who I am!
  •  1 pound of a meat of your choosing. Original recipes always use ground beef, but I just use what I have. Last night I made it with smoked pulled pork. It was what dreams are made of.
  •  2 Tablespoons toasted sesame oil, or untoasted because it's cheaper.
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced 
  • 3-5 chopped green onions depending on how onion-y you like your breath.
  • 2 tablespoons low sodium soy sauce
  • 1 teaspoon of red pepper flakes
  • 1/2 teaspoon of ground ginger, or use fresh if you're fancy.
  • 1 teaspoon of some sort of vinegar
  • 1 packet of stevia or splenda if you like the aftertaste, or getting cancer. (Kidding, I just think of all the people who yell at me when I use artificial sweeteners. I had one girl on Instagram FREAK OUT about me getting cancer because I drink the occasional diet coke.)
  • Optional- 3 eggs
 Cook whatever meat you are using, and for the love of all that is good in this world, season it! Salt, pepper, onion, tears, what ever you want. But don't leave it bland. If you are using the same pan, set aside the seasoned mystery meat, and start heating your sesame oil. Toss in your garlic and onions. Let them sauté and soak up some good stuff before pouring the coleslaw mix in. 
 Now, I'm going to warn you. Every single time I make this dish I ALWAYS just pour the whole bag in, which makes a giant mess on my stove. Add handfuls of slaw into the pan, don't be like me. Let that all cook until the cabbage is the desired texture you like. I like mine pretty soft. Make a whole in the center of the slaw and pour 3 mixed eggs in there. Let it cook, and scramble the eggs. I think egg makes this dish what it is. 
 Add your meat back into the pan, while adding the rest of the ingredients. Mix it up super well. Let it sit for a few additional minutes. You can use this time to clean up the fucking mess you made with the coleslaw mix. 
  Serve hot, with hot sauce on top! Now unless you are some sort of chopstick wizard, I really recommend eating this with a fork.

Happy recipe Wednesday! Make sure you follow us on Instagram, and Twitter! @Raisingtaters

Monday, May 22, 2017

In the beautiful words of my favorite author Bunmi Laditan (if you don't know who she is, go buy ALL of her books. All of them.)
"Toddlers are assholes, and it's not your fault."

  I don't have a lot left today. I'm tired and it was a stressful day. I'm basically just copy and pasting the post from Facebook. I went to Barre tonight and I really didn't want to go. But I did want to go because I needed a few MOMents away from this kiddo. I've said two is hard time and time again, but two is FUCKING hell. My friend Chasity said "They're just primal." I couldn't agree more... 
  My kid bit another kid today and I was so embarrassed. I became THAT mom, with THAT kid. "The biter." I cried from embarrassment and filled my head with shame. What did I do or not do to create this behavior? How did I as the parent mess up? I'm not giving him enough attention. I'm not meeting his needs.
  The mom of the other kid came over with a beautiful sense of humor and said to her son "you got chomped on? You'll be okay." 
  I turned to her with my tail between my legs and apologized. Tears were in my eyes, and stress created a Grand Canyon on my forehead. She laughed, telling me her son used to bite too, and that it happens. She wasn't hateful, or angry with me (or tater.) She just got it. She understood the emotions that were racing in my head. The other people with kids did the same thing. They comforted me, didn't shame me, and got it. No one around was angry, except for me. I was my own bully. There's a lot of pressure for parents to be perfect, and there is a lot of pressure for the small humans we are raising to be perfect too. Kids bite and hit. It's not always a reflection of bad parenting, but merely a reminder that kids will be kids. Parents will mess up, and not know what to do. Today I felt like a shit mom, but tomorrow is a new day, with new attitudes and new lessons. So if you're struggling tonight with your direction, or just in general know that you aren't alone. Kids are tough, but parents are tougher. We have to stick together, while making our own way.
  We also need to listen to what we say to ourselves. We are our own worst critic, and bully. The harsh reality of it is- none of us really know what we are doing. Take it easy on yourself too. We treat our souls like shit sometimes. We beat our spirits up, which causes emotional damage. I am emotionally abusive to myself. I'm too mean to me. ME of all people. 

Take some time tonight to wrap up into yourself and relax. We've got this.
On a different note, I think I'm going to change the blog name to Raising Jaws.

Friday, May 12, 2017

  This is absolutely a rant post, so I apologize in advance for my potenial 'F' word usage. So here we go...

 Why? It's like this two sided battle of who's right and wrong. One side wants to be alone, the other wants to be with their kids. It's turned into this shaming battle of nonsense. As an overtired, overemotional Mom I could literally give two fucking shits about how anyone else spends Mother's Day. SO WHY IS THIS AN ISSUE?! I've seen so many people say things like:
  "Oh you don't want to be with your kids? That's just sad. It's MOTHER'S day, they made you a Mom- blah blah blah"
  Then from the other side spews this tomfoolery:
  "You just don't get it because you get a break from your kid for this and that reason. You're doing it wrong. blah blah blah."

 As if there wasn't enough pressure to be a "Good Mom" these days. We literally get shamed for EVERY. CHOICE. WE. MAKE. Even if that choice is doing what others told us to do! If we share anything that we are doing with any other Mom you likely get that "Oh no honey, that's wrong. Here is 543 articles to prove it, and my pediatricians assistants boyfriend's, official statement on it." 
 There was a day where all we had to do was make sure your kid was fed, and happy. Now we've turned into gluten free, no tv, no screens, attachment parenting, organic, no sugar monsters who judge one another. We have a thumb on every second, of our kids life... but god forbid we don't the whole santicmommy crew is down your throat. 
  It's time to cut this bullshit out. You celebrate Mother's Day however you see fit. 

Happy Mother's day to the Moms who have it all figured out, and to the ones who go 10 seconds at a time. You all rock, but stop being suck a dick to each other. It takes a village people.


Thursday, May 4, 2017

  I have been trying to lose weight since 5th grade. Yep, you read that right. Fifth Grade... I read all the Seventeen magazine clips on how to get skinny. In high school I "tried" but failed. As an adult I would yo-yo. I would lose some, gain it back plus some. After I had Tater I balloned out. I tried every MLM for weight loss. I tried It works (just a tip, it doesn't work,) I tried Thrive which worked for a little bit, and then it stopped working so I gave up. I tried working out, but eating healthy was my down fall. I always felt so deprived... I craved potatoes and pasta. I gave in every time I wanted something.
  In December B came to me with this idea. We were both the heaviest we had ever been, it was affecting us mentally, and physically. He found this "diet" called Keto. There was a whole subreddit about and the results were incredible. People were losing hundreds of pounds, and some of them weren't even exercising. I was so hesitant on starting, because diets NEVER worked for us before. I started reading on what we would need to eat and I didn't believe it. There was no way we would lose weight eating butter, bacon, and cheese.
 So what is keto? Keto refers to the Ketogenic diet where your body produces ketones.
This is an insert from the Keto Subreddit. I did NOT write this next part:

1. What Does Keto Do to My Body?

Ketosis, to put it simply, is the state in which you burn fat for fuel. The human body isn’t stupid, it will burn what it has in most abundance that yields the most energy for its volume. Carbs (some) burn up quick but are packed with INTENSE fuel that yield large bursts of energy. Compare this to an energy drink that a lot of modern culture seems to adore. Fat and protein burn slowly and allow a steady stream of energy; your energy levels won’t soon crash because your body can’t get rid of it near as fast as carbohydrates.
Ketosis also helps regulate your blood without complications. Involving complex carbs into your diet causes your body to heighten your blood sugar and as a result produce insulin. This stuff is nasty in large amounts; consider it to be your blood’s very own personal, fat-kicking police force. High blood sugar is interpreted as TOXIC by your body, so the insulin regulates your blood to cleanse it. Soon, though, your body starts struggling to keep up; when you take high amounts of carbs (sugar) and the insulin cant keep up....your body converts sugar to fat and insulin stores it in cells. Your body is capable of regulating your blood sugar on its own without help when you aren’t mainlining so much sucrose. Ketogenic diets avoid such problems!
“But what about heart disease and cholesterol? I DON’T WANNA DIE; BACON ISN’T WORTH IT!”
There is no evidence linking ANY bad cholesterol or heart disease with animal fat. Early human beings ate more than FIVE TIMES the modern recommended intake of animal fat and protein; do not worry about high ANYTHING while on Keto other than energy levels.

  We did our research and dived in head first. The first morning I tried bulletproof coffee, which has butter, coconut oil and coffee blended together. My Paula Dean dreams came true when I put BUTTER in my coffee. It is so creamy, so perfect. I made B's while he watched with a strange face.
"Why are you putting lube in the coffee?" He said. I laughed so hard. This was our life now. (Coconut oil is a really killer natural lubricant. This was the coconut oil I cook with though so there was no Weiner cross contamination. Sorry if you read this Dad...) Our first morning was a success.  Bulletproof coffee was perfectly married with bacon and eggs. Dinner on the other hand was kind of a fail. I made stuffed peppers with cauliflower and ground beef. I was so focused on low calorie food that I forgot we needed high fat. We were both starving, and hateful towards cauliflower. I wasn't going to let this fail us so I turned to Pinterest. My old, frenemy.
 I looked at recipe after recipe, and made a game plan. The first two weeks sucked, I'm not going to lie. My body was so used to carbs that I was withdrawing like a drug addict. I got a rash, a headache and the shakes at time. I craved sugar like I never had before. I wanted my fix but I powered through. As time went on I got better at adapting my recipes to being low carb, and we tried new things. We still hate cauliflower though.... Week 3 came around and I was craving less. I adjusted my calorie intake to create a deficit and powered through. As time went one we figured out what we liked, and what we didn't. We learned a lot about our bodies, and our willpower. We kept each other honest. We struggled, slipped up, and failed some days. Four weeks in we finally decided to step on the scale. I was 25 pounds down. I was in a different sized pant, plus my confidence when I saw that number sky rocketed. The number didn't matter, what mattered is that something was working for me, for us. We weren't starving, we didn't hate what we were eating and we were happy. I'm talking balls to the wall happy. Our energy had returned, plus we actually had the time to make for one another. This has been so much more than changing the way we eat. This has been changing the way we live, and love. The power of food really is incredible.
  Flash forward to today. We've (B and myself) lost 110 pounds together. I still have about 35 pounds of fat loss to go. I went from a size 22, 2X shirt to a size 14- size medium/large shirt. I can shop in the ladies section for the first time in years. I can share clothes with my sister in law. It's amazing what weight loss does to your spirit.
  HERE is a direct link to where we got started.
 HERE is my progress.
If any of you want help getting started I would be happy to guide you in the ways of the keto. You can follow me on Instagram @Raisingtaters where you'll see food, and my results!


Monday, April 17, 2017

                            Image result for ugh gif
 Kid gyms. Let's have a fun chat about these germ filled buildings of tears, and broken dreams.
We go at least 2 times a month, and I have a love/hate relationship. It takes a certain amount of mental preparation to get me to take my son there. There are 3 facts I know when it comes to kid gyms.
1)My kid is going to get sick.
2)Someones kid is going to say Fuck
3)I'm going to hate 80% of the Moms that are in there.
Now before we talk about "Mom shaming, and being kind" I want to explain why I don't like them. There is ALWAYS a group of Moms in overpriced see through yoga pants, sitting in the cafe and not watching their children. They usually roll their eyes at my mismatched watermelon socks, and my flawfilled(I am aware that isn't a word.) dry shampoo-ed to no end ponytail. The best part about that group is it's usually one of their procreation miracles who says "FUCK" really loud, or bites someone.
  When we get in the car to go I give myself a mental pep talk. I tell myself nice things, and say that if I'm a good Mom I can get an iced coffee afterward. I should be having that conversation with my kid, but who am I kidding. He is better behaved in social situations than I am. We pull into the parking lot and I sit for a second. Secretly I pray that it's closed, but at the same time if this toddler demon doesn't burn energy it's not going to be a good day. We walk inside, the kid takes off and I pay. As a parent, I too have to take my shoes off. ---> Side note, DON'T BE THAT ASSHOLE PARENT THAT DOESN'T TAKE THEIR SHOES OFF.
  I wander around with the small human, ackwardly making eye contact with other parents that are there alone. There is always to token stay at home Dad. Everyone looks at that guy like he's a god damn unicorn.A child is running around SCREAMING. Life is normal. I walk toward the back where Tater always runs to. I scan the perimeter like I'm some mall cop.
 Fifteen minutes in I relax a little bit. Tater is usually playing with someone, or a ball. I'll casually make small talk with Unicorn Dad. Sometimes, a cool Mom will compliment my socks. I really try to wear matching socks, I do. It's hard to wear socks when you rarely wear shoes though. I keep a random pair in my car just for the kid gym.
 30 minutes pass, and things are getting a little nuts. Some little asshole shoved my kid down, and instead of crying he just wanted to hug the bully. Sweet, little granola baby. Kid is going to be a hippie. My patience is wearing thin, and I'm reminding myself of that ice coffee that I do deserve. I've said (both mentally and out loud) WHERE ARE YOUR PARENTS?! to other children at least 84.5 times. Yoga pant, stick ass mom group is laughing, and the rest of the cafe parents have head phones in. One kid is stuck in the bounce house.
 45 minutes. Tater walks over to me and asks for a snack. We wash hands because kids are gross, and eat the unorganic apple sauce pouch. It's Costco brand so the sanctimoms are really starring at me know. He drinks and water and back to the playground. Token Dad makes eye contract and does the "I'm visibly exhausted and my children are going to kill me" face.
   We make it passed an hour. The Tater is slowing down. I'm feeling victorious. We have a mini melt down as I put shoes on him. Off to the car we go. I'm really excited about that ice coffee now. I earned it, damnit! We pull in to Starbucks and I pat myself on the back.
   I didn't swear or punch anyone. Life is good.

There was no purpose to this post other than to let you into my head while I go to the kid gym.
Happy Monday!


Tuesday, April 4, 2017

                    Image result for squirrel gif
I have 500 things to do so I'm going to do them all 15 seconds at a time. 
 I swear having little humans gives you a mild form of A.D.D. Today is a really perfect representation of that. It began this morning when I went into the kitchen for a cup of coffee. I set my cup under the Keurig and decided I needed to put away some dishes. I put away the dishes, and then got dressed. Halfway through getting dressed I remembered I didn't have my contacts. Instead of putting on a shirt, I walked to the bathroom and threw in the magic circles that let me see. Then I saw my foundation and put the liquid on before remembering I needed a shirt. I walked to the bedroom, threw on a shirt, and went downstairs because "Oh yeah, coffee."
 I wandered downstairs, to realize the K-Cup box was empty. So I needed to go to Target. I got the toddler dressed, and out the door we went. My face was incomplete and I looked a little sick, to be honest. We get to the Target parking lot before I realize my face isn't done. Thank goodness there is a thing of powder in my glove box. I put on a quick face, get the toddler's shoes on, and in we go. I stop at the Starbucks inside because again- Coffee.
 We start in the cursed dollar section. I give myself the usual Target pep talk... "You need coffee. You are literally here for K cups. NOTHING ELSE."
 The pep talk usually doesn't work. I see a "Paint Your Own" Marshall from Paw Patrol. It's snowing and this would be a good activity to do today. In the cart it goes. That's where trouble always begins... The stupid dollar spot. We start wandering the store, Tater has a cake pop and I have the nectar of the God's. Life is good. This is when the A.D.D. kicks in. -or OOO! Look, something shiny or on clearance. We make it over to the food section with only the Marshall in the cart. I forget why I'm there, but needed tuna, so I get some. We make our way over to the cleaning section. They have 5 dollars off 20 dollars of cleaning supplies. I can't ignore that deal, because I do need stuff. I pick up the cleaning stuff and make my way to check out. I get distracted and look at earrings, but don't buy any. I check out with my favorite cashier, and we talk for a few minutes. I grab my refill from the Starbucks counter and head to the car.
  If you're paying attention you realize that I did not get K Cups. I head home, put the kid down for a nap. All of my goodies are still in the trunk. I grab some water, and hand wash the dishes in the sink. I set them out to dry, and then start picking up the living room. Half way through that I remember my laptop was in the basement so I run downstairs to grab it. I tidy up the workout area, sort of. I bring my laptop upstairs. I tell myself I need to work on my book. I write 6 sentences, email a chapter to my MBFF (Mom BFF) 
 We talk about her babies, and how finding Mom friends suck. I remember how much I miss her, and go creep on her Instagram. I start writing again, and then remember I have a blog post to write. I ignore that post and start this one. I get up 5-24 times to do various other things. I realize that I am Dug from Up.

  Two hours later here I am finishing this post, so I can publish it. Nothing I was supposed to do is complete, but I'm slowly chipping away at it. 
Life is nuts. I'm going to go half ass vacuum my stairs, before I realize I need to replace the plug ins for my house. 


Tuesday, March 28, 2017

                             Image result for prized heifer
                             ( a prize heifer because I think I'm funny.)
  I don't get political often, and when I do I try really hard not to offend others. Today I'm getting political. I want to talk about modern feminists and being a stay at home Mom. I am all for true feminism which is defined as :the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes. 

 I believe that all women should be equal in every way, but for some reason modern feminists aren't searching for equality but superiority. This is NOT all feminists, just a select bunch who are willing to burn down men, and any women who doesn't agree with them. They are not true feminists. I am a stay at home Mom, a wife, and partner in my marriage. We do statically gender role things in our marriage and I am sick of being belittled for it. 
 Yep, I do the laundry, dishes, and keep the house clean. I do the shopping, cooking, and "child rearing" solo for 10 hours a day, four days a week. My husband is the sole provider for our household. He makes the money, I just spend it at Target. The way we run our household works for us. I know my husband is more than capable of doing these things, but this is how I contribute. 
  I've learned that I shouldn't tell people without kids (especially women) that I am a stay at home Mom. If I do tell people it sometimes comes with acceptance, or this complete look of betrayel. I've had someone say to me;
           "Do you realize how far you are setting back women?"
           "I'm sad you are wasting your worth/education/dreams."
           "That's really disappointing."
           "You're worth so much more than that. Your husband should value that."
           "You could go back to work. Unless your husband won't let you."     
           "You're failing every women who has ever worked for equality."
This isn't even all the things that I've heard about being a stay at home parent. This isn't even the worst of them! These are things that have been said straight to my face. The things that have been said over the internet are far worse. 
  There are so many misconceptions that come with being a stay at home parent, and a lot of them revolve around feminism, or what people think is feminism. I want to clear these up, because I am damn tired of being told I'm less of a woman for staying home with my child. 
1. No one forced me to be married. My Dad didn't trade my "hand" for a prized freakin' heifer. (Although, there was this one time in South Dakota at a gas station by the Corn Palace- where a stranger offered a pig for me. He might have considered it, I'm not sure.) I'm really happy to be married to a man that lifts me up everyday.
2. No one forced me to have babies. I am not a machine for producing children. Now, was my delicate bundle of sass a surprise? Yes, he was. BUT NO ONE FORCED ME TO HAVE A CHILD. 
3. I was not forced to quit my job, or leave my dreams behind. If anything having a child, and staying home has pushed me closer to my dream of being a published author. I have to go about things differently, but my drive to succeed is no different than it was. I have goals, I will meet those goals, and I will do it while raising a small human. 
4. I AM NOT SETTING WOMEN'S RIGHTS BACK BY BEING A MOM, WIFE, OR STAY AT HOME PARENT. Being a Mom is so empowering for me. My body made a person, and then shoved that person out. Of course I am going to want to be with this person! Yes, I do miss working sometimes. There are days where I question every life choice I've ever made, but I LOVE what I do? Why isn't that enough for some people. 

 Feminism should be about equality, and empowering women. If no one is getting hurt, or being forced into a life they don't want then why are we degrading others? Why does it matter if I make my husband pies, and raise my baby from home? I admire working parents so much, so why do they belittle those who stay home? Why do we assume that women are forced into these things? Why do you assume that our husbands don't value us? WHY. So many why questions, and I never seem to get an answer other then "Well you should know what you are doing wrong." 
  So "modern feminism" you have absolutely failed the stay at home parent. Let's fix that. To all my true feminists, you keep on doing your thing. No matter what you do, you are valued. 

drop mic. 

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

It's Wednesday! Which means I'm here with a recipe for you all, and some snark. I'm feeling extra sassy today. Maybe it's the coffee, or the lack of sleep. Tater was up all night sick, so I'm living one cup of coffee at a time today. That first sip of coffee is always so life changing. It's warm, and holds you in close. I love me a good cup of coffee.
  I love/hate when Tater is sick. I feel horrible that there is literally nothing I can do to make him feel better, but I LOVE when he naps on the couch for 3/4 of the day. It's almost like having the day off. I don't have to clean up toys. All I have to do is be super Mom by throwing on the same 4 movies on Netflix. Oh, and you know feed him and stuff. He is totally a soup fiend when he doesn't feel good. I fucking love a good cup of soup, so it all works out when he is sick.
 For today's Recipe Wednesday I brought back my most shared recipe. Baked Potato Soup!! Recently I've had a lot of traffic from Keto Parents, because of the way we are eating now. So for my fellow low carb, high fat eaters I've attached modifications in bold to make it 100% Keto approved!

Enjoy your Wednesday everyone!

You will need:
4-5 Russet Potatoes Cubed into small pieces (Or 2 cups chopped Daikon) 
7 strips of bacon
1 clove garlic
1 leak chopped
5 tablespoons butter
2.5 cups chicken stock
2 cups Milk (Heavy Cream)
1/4 flour (or 2 TBS Xanthan Gum)
1 cup cheddar cheese
salt, pepper, crushed red pepper flakes, paprika.

  1. Cut up potatoes into small cubes. I prefer mine small because they cook faster. Then cut up two slices of bacon, garlic, and half of the leaks; toss into the bottom of a hot pot. Sprinkle some oil on to prevent the potatoes from sticking. Stir frequently. 
  2. After the bacon is a bit crispy add the butter into the center of the pan. once the butter is melted, pour the flour on top of the melted butter. Mix well, and let flour brown. Well that is browning, toss the remaining bacon into a frying pan, and fry until very crispy. Set aside bacon when done.
  3. Once the flour is browned, and bubbly... slowly whisk in chicken broth. Let simmer for 10-15 minutes until potatoes are soft. I usually add in some salt and pepper at this point too.
  4. Stir in milk and cheese. Cover and let simmer on low for 10-20 minutes. the soup should thicken nicely. Season to taste.
  5. Serve hot with crumbled bacon, cheese, and leaks on top! Goes great with a grilled cheese sandwich!


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S is a snarky Mom, with a lot to say. This blog covers every thing from an abundant amount of vomit, to things that are just too sticky. You'll find recipes, laughs, and honesty. With a toddler, a dog, and a really patient husband this Mama can accomplish things.